Will you listen to me?
You don’t have any anger toward me, do you?
I hope you don’t want to punish me, especially
for something I haven’t done.
Please be fair with me!
I am deformed and I worry all the time
because I want you to like me, but I don’t
understand your words.
I cannot do much of anything to make myself better.
I know that I must look all messed up!
I don’t want to be like this forever.
I need love, but I also need to feel at ease with myself.
When you are quiet I feel like I am dead.
I cannot even talk with you. I don’t think you’re listening.
Something made us drift apart.
I get tired and disgusted. I even cry myself to sleep, feeling
so miserable with confusion and exhaustion.
Why bother wiping the tears from my eyes when they just keep
falling? I have spent so much time turning away from your
voice and telling myself that you do not exist.
Can you be quiet if you don’t have the right things
to tell me that I need to hear? Surely you hear my sobbing.
You probably feel pity for me when you see me.
I hardly know any more whether you hear me.
Whatever you say, I sense you leaving me to my own peacefulness.
You have been such little help and have filled me with anguish.
I feel free of your directions and in touch with great wisdom.