Pressure

We’ve seen some rain in the last 24 hours. The skies are completely gray this morning. I haven’t seen a gray morning for several weeks. I think more rain is in the forecast. I know we need rain. Driving up and down the coast this week and over into the lower Santa Clara Valley, all the hills looked so brown, as if ready to burn. There is a pretty soft brown that shows up in the hills when the rain season stops and the grass goes dry, but that soft brown has become more of a harsh and ugly brown, at least the way I look at it.

We drove down to the town of Gilroy yesterday in the late afternoon, passing through and eating some salad in the parking lot of a grocery store, while we sat on the periphery of the parking lot in our car, and watched huge black clouds rolling in from the south. I learned later on in the day that those black clouds brought in a hailstorm over the town of Gilroy. Walking around Gilroy, people seemed delighted to have anything in the way of wetness fall out of the sky. I had been sitting on a bench reading a science fiction novel on my Kindle when the first fine drops landed on my screen. I read I lot of things on my Kindle, but now I can even use it to read the weather.

The purpose of my trip to Santa Clara County yesterday was to visit my doctor and discuss my high blood pressure medication. I just stopped taking it because it made me dizzy, and my change in diet last year made me think that I no longer needed the medication. I’m still too high though. I found that out when I went in for my annual eye examination, and the eye doctor saw that the arteries in the back of my eye had been stretched or were puffy, or some such darned thing that made her suspect I need to get back on my medication. It was kind of a letdown for me. I thought for sure I had been faithful enough with my diet, and I trusted that being faithful would do some wonderful healing things for me, but I suppose I am a little bit too optimistic. So I am back on the medication once again, but a new kind. One that is more like a water pill, that does not have the side effect of making me dizzy.

My doctor handed me all the paperwork to go have the lab rats draw blood from my arm. I hope to have purged all the fat from my system. Who knows, my old system before I went on the new diet loved fat so much that maybe it is keeping it hidden somewhere in my body so that it can feast on it. So far, I have managed to keep off of any kind of cholesterol-lowering medication, and I would like to continue that way, which is why I went on the vegan diet a year ago. When I began the new way of eating, what attracted me was the promise that I might be able to stay out of doctors offices, hospitals, and laboratories, for many years, until I might reach some natural point of departure from this world. Promises, promises… Reality and me have always had a conflict.

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